Saying "positive things" when someone is having problems is most likely to keep them from making any changes that would improve the situation. Assuring an absolute stranger that she's a great mom is not only useless—it can be harmful.
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I'm willing to support people in their quest to understand natural learning and mindful parenting, but that support involves helping them understand the principles behind why it works, and finding ways to adapt their lives in ways that will help it flourish in their families.
"By relinquishing the desire to control, you help your child onto the path of living mindfully themselves, making choices and decisions mindfully and deliberately, instead of reactively."
Being nice to another person is what makes one nice.
Being patient with another person is what makes one patient.
If a parent says hatefully "BE GOOD," he's not being very good.
Instead of telling a young child "Be nice, and be patient," the parent should be nice, and patient. It's a generality, and a truism, but it's generally true.
"You can read all the books, you can talk to unschoolers, attend a conference and join some lists. But until you GET IT at the internal level, until there is trust and a willingness to extend that trust to your children, unschooling is just a nice idea or philosophy to discuss...nothing more. For those that decide to learn to trust themselves and their children, they soon find their lives a bubbly, interesting swirl of natural learning."